I reaaly didn't want to write this
I was praying this morning about what to write today. (I know that sounds so spiritual) The thought about leading with your heart and loving people kept coming to my mind. I really wasn’t feeling it. I wanted to write something funny or stir up folks.
I got to the office and began reading some post form other friends and found a theme. Several guys were posting about keeping relational distance in ministry. They had some good points. One said that people often have agenda and want to get close to you to influence you their way. NO KIDDING! Another said that limited time means to invest in your marriage and kids. That is true. Then I can across a pastor of a huge church and he said “I have chosen to live life with a few folks, and this has been the best decision I have ever made.” WOW! This guy is on the right track! I understand why God is using his life in a great way.
We who are called to pastor are called to love people. People are messy. I am messy. Here are a very quick takes on how to lead, love, and connect with folks…
• People will hurt you and disappoint you, expect it
• No secrets, no worries. Be real with everyone
• Folks are looking to you to lead them to Christ. That means they are watching everything you do. It is not fair but it is real
• Stay close to Jesus, your spouse, your kids
• Practice what you preach, really!
• Look for friends who love Jesus and love you. I listen to folks who love me and love Jesus. If you don’t love me then don’t bother me!
• There are some folks who are a big pain, and you are a big pain to some folks
• The greatest gift I give to the folks I lead is my heart
I lead the church in Texas for 15 years. I have wonderful friends there. Upon my leaving I was hurt by some of those same friends. So what! God is giving me some wonderful friends here in Tallahassee. I can’t hold back because of the hurts of the past. I am hearing of so many leaders who pride themselves in isolationism. That bothers me. Paul said in 1 Thessalonians 2:8 “We loved you so much that we gave you not only God’s Good News but our own lives too.” God called me to preach but mostly God has called me to love and connect. What do you think?
I got to the office and began reading some post form other friends and found a theme. Several guys were posting about keeping relational distance in ministry. They had some good points. One said that people often have agenda and want to get close to you to influence you their way. NO KIDDING! Another said that limited time means to invest in your marriage and kids. That is true. Then I can across a pastor of a huge church and he said “I have chosen to live life with a few folks, and this has been the best decision I have ever made.” WOW! This guy is on the right track! I understand why God is using his life in a great way.
We who are called to pastor are called to love people. People are messy. I am messy. Here are a very quick takes on how to lead, love, and connect with folks…
• People will hurt you and disappoint you, expect it
• No secrets, no worries. Be real with everyone
• Folks are looking to you to lead them to Christ. That means they are watching everything you do. It is not fair but it is real
• Stay close to Jesus, your spouse, your kids
• Practice what you preach, really!
• Look for friends who love Jesus and love you. I listen to folks who love me and love Jesus. If you don’t love me then don’t bother me!
• There are some folks who are a big pain, and you are a big pain to some folks
• The greatest gift I give to the folks I lead is my heart
I lead the church in Texas for 15 years. I have wonderful friends there. Upon my leaving I was hurt by some of those same friends. So what! God is giving me some wonderful friends here in Tallahassee. I can’t hold back because of the hurts of the past. I am hearing of so many leaders who pride themselves in isolationism. That bothers me. Paul said in 1 Thessalonians 2:8 “We loved you so much that we gave you not only God’s Good News but our own lives too.” God called me to preach but mostly God has called me to love and connect. What do you think?
Labels: leadership
posted by Scott Weatherford at
11:19 AM
2 Comments:
Scott,
Great stuff! On a discussion board for one of my seminary classes someone criticized a friend who is "now a pastor-gone-CEO" because he read "some book, probably by Warren or that Hybels guy". This guy did his best to make those names synonymous with the name of Satan. Anyway, after reading the entire post it became apparent that this "pastor-gone-CEO" had committed the sin of not putting himself completely at the whim of every Tom, Dick and Harry who wanted to call him up on the spot and talk about how their eighth cousin twice removed's third aunt had a dog with an ingrown toenail. My, but how incredibly unthoughtful of him!
Somewhere in the history of the church (perhaps recently?), the congregation came up with this idea that the people are the ignorant sheep needing spiritual guidance, and the pastors are purely the ministers who need to be spending all day, every day doing hospital visitation and making cold calls to members to make sure everything's all right. I tend to respectfully disagree; as you've said to me several times before, the ministers are in the congregation, not just the pastorate.
That was just a thought I had while thinking about your statement about a pastor living his life with a few friends. When I finally become a vocational pastor I guess I'll have to clearly explain to my congregation that the Holy Spirit doesn't descend from on high every morning and bestow me with a 50 hour day; I've got responsibilities in my job just like everyone else.
Finally, watch out for those sycophants. They're blood-sucking parasites!
By
Allen Keller, At
July 18, 2008 11:58 PM
Scott, I enjoyed both your blog and Allen's comment.
As a "lay-person" I have to agree with you COMPLETELY! No man, woman, or child can be all things to all people all the time! I have learned this lesson numerous times, painfully!
I have a sales background and to be successful I had to give large amounts of myself to my customers and to make the sale, sometimes I've had to or watched my colleagues do things that were truly beyond their scope and not at all part of simply delivering good customer service.
As much as some people don't want to hear this, a church, the way we know it today, is a business. I think. It needs to be profitable to accomplish it's mission and it needs to be organized and it also needs to be united in a common purpose. If you are to be a successful business leader, you cannot let your people, your customers, if you will, your congregation and their needs rule your life!
You are a leader God has chosen. You need to facilitate folks coming to Christ, but you have the power of the Holy Spirit to help you and guide you! WOW, what non-believing CEO has that?
You also need to build future leaders and show your members how to serve one another. That's it, sounds simpler that it is in reality, I know. :-)
On the flip side. No one knows how much love the heart can hold, I want to caution you on living your life with a "few" people. A few for me might be 5, a few for you might be 5,000! I don't think there is a magic number. Your true friends, those who love you and respect you will understand if you are too busy to talk to them most days, but they will be there for you when you need them!
As a member of another church in town, I feel guilty talking to the pastor because I feel like he is so busy with so many people wanting his attention and he has his own wife and kids that I just don't want to bog him down. I love him and pray for him but I know God has put lots of people in his life to love him and I don't need to be that person. I also know that if I have a Spiritual crisis I can call on him and he will be there, but I also have friends from my Bible study that I feel comfortable calling 24/7 for support, I don't feel like the Sr. pastor has any more "special Spiritual power" than my friend in Bible study. Sure, my friend hasn't gone to seminary and hasn't coached hundreds of others through similar problems, but my friend knows me and the details of my situation intimately. The senior pastor cannot possibly know everything about everyone in his congregation! That is unrealistic and tremendously arrogant.
Jesus is the Sheppard, we are all just sheep.
"BAAAHH!"
(look what happens when you end your blog with, "what do you think?")
By
danamj79, At
July 24, 2008 12:17 AM
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